I used to

Tuesday, October 20, 2015 1 comments

I used to build a shelter out of you but you took the screws and bricks and built a home for yourself, one that had no space for me and now I feel homesick for a place that no longer exists.

I used to make a blanket out of your arms, sought refuge in them when days were cold and lately, the weather has been harsh but as I tried to seek the blanket that I once owned, you moved away, wishing to only cover your own skin.

I used to explore the universe by connecting the moles on your back, pretending they were constellations of stars but you took the map off my hands and though you knew that without it, I would be lost, you kept it for yourself not caring if whether or not I find my way back to you.

I used to love you with the kind of love that I thought only existed in fairy tales and movies, the kind that makes you believe in a "true love's kiss" but you didn't tell me that the apple I bit was dipped in poison, slowly killing me from the inside, realizing that there's no such thing as prince charming only witches and dark queens.

I used to love you with a love deeper than the pacific ocean, a love that not even the best of divers could measure but you came in like a tsunami, setting us off course, leaving us in places we should not be, drowning the things we have long fought for.

I used to survive only by the breath that came out of your mouth, using your body as an oxygen tank to supply myself with everything I needed to live but you replaced oxygen with something unfamiliar and instead of breathing, I am suffocating.

I used to dream of a future with you, where we live out our dreams and have a family of our own but look at where I am now, stuck in my dorm room alone, wiping the tears off my face as I write about you, the person who I could have loved my entire life if only he was capable of doing the same.


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