Should i say goodbye?

"May be surrounded by a million people, I still feel all alone. Just wanna go home. Let me go home."

That particular line in the song "Home" by Michael Buble explains exactly how i feel. This weekend has been a really depressing one. Why? Because I feel homesick. I yearn to see my family. Right now, All i want is to feel the comfort of being with the ones i love the most. Is that too much to ask?

People say that i'm an "emotional roller coaster". One minute, I'd be laughing out loud and the next, I'll be crying about some random thing, a sad movie perhaps or a painful memory. Whatever the reason is, I easily feel sad and that sadness can also be easily taken away. So, when i felt gloomy about missing home, i didn't pay much attention to it, Thinking that it was just me being melodramatic. But the thing is, It's not painful. I'm not hurting in any way but when i look within, there's nothing, absolutely.. Nothing.. Just emptiness. 

I don't know why i feel this way. I don't know why being away from home can make this big hole in my heart.

Don't get me wrong, Okay? I'm not saying that i don't like Angeles City or the People here. The truth is, being here has been undoubtedly wonderful. I've made good friends, learned lots of things, experienced freedom from the strict rules of my ever-so-loving father, i learned to be independent and the list just goes on and on.

But though this city is beautiful. Though the people are wonderful.

It's still not HOME.

So, after thinking about it. I thought to myself.. 

"If being here for a few months is making me miserable, what would happen to me in four years?" 

Though I'd be able to go back home every Semestral break and Summer vacation, I still don't think that i would be able to survive living here for that long. Which is why i had to make a decision. Either i stay here, continue my studies at AUF and hope that somehow the emptiness within me would subside OR transfer to a university that is near home. 

I haven't fully made up my mind yet. But i already told my father and He says that we'll talk about it. I know that transferring schools would require me to adjust again and that there would be lots of paperwork to be done but i just can't imagine staying here for FOUR long years.

As i said earlier, My decision isn't final. I might change my mind but hopefully, Whatever i decide to choose,  I'd be able to stick with it and not regret it in the future.